Dion Phaneuf is on the verge of signing a seven-year extension with the Leafs, valued at $7 million per year. The cap hit comes with major sticker shock, but it's a deal the Leafs needed to make.

The tide might be turning against Randy Carlyle.

After a quick start to the season has been erased by an awful November and the first few weeks of Deathcember, the shine on Carlyle, the coach responsible for ending Toronto's near decade-long playoff drought, is starting to fade. Last year many of his moves were roundly criticised by the blogosphere and some of the saner elements of the mainstream media (shout out to James Mirtle!), but the Leafs were winning, so for the broader portion of newspaper writers and television analysts Carlyle could do no wrong.

The same reverence for Carlyle no longer exists. Many of his puzzling moves are being questioned by pundits who might have looked the other way last year. Winning cleans up a lot of mistakes, even those made by coaches.

With the Leafs in the midst of a tailspin, the vultures are looking for easy scapegoats, and as always, some in the mainstream media are pointing fingers at the wrong guys.

Simmons "Kadri has basically gone from an 80 point guy to a 50 point guy" Still better than Bozak and not on the top PP or on the top line
— Hope_Smoke (@Hope_Smoke) December 3, 2013

It is a dark time for the Maple Leafs. Although the playoffs drought has been destroyed, the opposition has driven the Toronto forces from their lofty Eastern Conference perch and hammered them across the conference. Evading the dreaded regression monster, a group of heroes led by James Reimer and Jonathan Bernier have established hope on the ice. The evil lord Carlyle, obsessed with allowing the most shots ever, has dispatched thousands of forwards onto the far reaches of the bench to allow more ice time for Tyler Bozak....

The next great Chicago Blackhawks yard sale is tentatively scheduled for summer 2015. At that time both Patrick Kane and Jonathan Toews are unrestricted free agents and keeping them both is going to make the Hawks cap situation very interesting.

After winning the Stanley Cup in 2010, the Hawks were gutted in the off-season, unloading Dustin Byfuglien, Kris Versteeg, and Andrew Ladd (among others) in trades, walking away from Antti Niemi's contract in arbitration, and letting useful bit parts like John Madden and Adam Burish walk in free agency. In other words, the Hawks lost a first-pairing defenceman, a No. 1 goalie, two top-six forwards, and a whole lot of depth. No wonder it took two years for the Blackhawks to get back to the top.

Last summer's post-championship off-season didn't hurt the Hawks quite as much, with far fewer significant pieces departing, but the Hawks' depth was still hurt. Chicago dealt Dave Bolland and Michael Frolik in trades, and lost Ray Emery and Viktor Stalberg to free agency.

Expect the next Chicago sell-off to look more like the post-2010 Cup trade bonanza rather than last year's shuffling, because Toews and Kane are going to bring in monster salaries and everyone else is going to feel the squeeze.

After one game of Jay McClement as the team's best natural centre, the Leafs addressed their desperate need down the middle by making a deal with the Anaheim Ducks.

The Leafs acquired Peter Holland and Brad Staubitz from the Ducks on Saturday, shipping out Jesse Blacker, a conditional third-round pick (that could become a second-round pick if he plays 25 games), and a seventh-round pick (which was originally Anaheim's).

The primary parts of the deal, Holland and Blacker, were both blocked in their respective organizations, with Anaheim deep at centre and Toronto deep on the blueline. Blacker had fallen so far on the depth chart in Toronto that he has been a healthy scratch for much of the year with the Marlies.

Dave Nonis did well to deal from a position of strength to get a quality NHL-ready prospect when the Leafs were in such dire need for help.

Steve Yzerman sits alone in a dark room, plotting his next move. "Lord Yzerman", his assistant meekly offers, "a decision must be made. What shall we do about S-s-s-s-s..." He can't bring himself to say the name. Yzerman looks at him with cold, steal eyes. "Bring me the head of young Douglas Hamilton."

The Rob Ford saga picked the best time to amp up. With the Leafs off for five days there was nothing else for people to talk about other than Rob Ford's crack escapades. It came at the perfect moment, because everyone could be distracted from the dire situation the Leafs find themselves in.

Who the hell is going to play centre for this team?

The Leafs train keeps rolling, wobbling only momentarily during the first month of the season. It doesn't matter how many shots the Leafs allow, Jonathan Bernier and James Reimer are there to stop them all, and the forwards are scoring more than an bearded high schooler driving a Firebird.

After signing Phil Kessel to a franchise record 8-year, $64 million contract to start the season, the next most important item for Dave Nonis is deciding what to do with Dion Phaneuf. If he decides to sign the soon-to-be free agent, it won't be cheap.

The Sabres keep making headlines, and for all the wrong reasons. They can't win a game, they are going to trade anyone decent for peanuts, and they now have more suspensions than wins. Woof!

Most defencemen aren't able to play in a shutdown role for years. It took Seth Jones two games.

For Nashville's first two games of the season, Shea Weber took on the heavy lifting and was matched up almost exclusively against the opposition's top lines. Barry Trotz spread out Jones' minutes evenly amongst everyone else.

But when Roman Josi, Weber's usual partner, went down with a head injury in the second game of the season, it opened up the door for Jones to take on more responsibility. A lot of responsibility.

Better days.

It isn't an easy time to be a hockey fan living in Western New York. Heck, it isn't a good time to be a hockey fan living anywhere in New York considering the poor start by the New York Rangers.

Morgan Rielly is making life very difficult for Dave Nonis and the Toronto Maple Leafs.

The 19-year-old defenceman made the Leafs out of training camp and has looked good so far with the big club. Rielly has four games remaining before the Leafs must decide whether or not to keep the talented blueliner or send him back to Moose Jaw to play in the WHL. Once Rielly plays his 10th game as a Maple Leaf the first year of his entry-level contract will kick in and he's here for good.

It's a very complex decision and not one management will take lightly. There are pros and cons to keeping Rielly and Nonis has a lot to weigh before making the decision.

To help him out I've summarized the debate in a segment called "Point/Counterpoint".

Elliotte Friedman publishes 30 Thoughts every Monday and it's something I look forward to reading every week. Friedman sprinkles in great quotes from GMs and executives, covers trade talk in a credible way, and gives a must-read rundown on the pressing issues in hockey.

It's a great format. And I'm going to rip it off completely. In the past I tried my own style of 30 Thoughts, which I called 41 shots. But 41 is a lot of ideas to get in, and I abandoned the format. Well, I've been re-inspired, not only because Friedman's 30 Thoughts are back after a summer hiatus, but also because Maple Leafs Hot Stove's Anthony Petrielli writes what he calls "Too Long for Twitter" on his personal blog, and it's pretty great as well.

But I'm going to be realistic and stick with 10 thoughts. I think I can manage that many. I hope to post what I'm dubbing "10 Minute Misconduct" every Friday and I will (hopefully) stick to that schedule. Although today's post is exclusively about the Leafs, in the future I'll give my thoughts on topics around the league, lest all my posts become "Dave Bolland: pretty great!"

I must admit I've never been a big fan of Dominik Hasek. His unconventional, flop-everywhere-and-somehow-have-the-puck-hit-me style always bothered me. Plus, he helped stick the dagger in an overachieving Leafs squad during the 1999 Eastern Conference Final. Worst of all, he had one of the stupidest goalie helmets of all time. I can't forgive the helmet.

But I appreciate the brilliance of Hasek.

Hours before the start of the regular season, Phil Kessel re-signed with the Toronto Maple Leafs for $64 million over 8 years.

With a number that big there are sure to be people losing their minds. To help you understand I put together a handy guide to answer any concerns you might have about the richest deal in Maple Leafs history.

The Maple Leafs traded Joe Colborne for a song because the organization values face punching over skill.

Late Saturday night the Maple Leafs dealt Joe Colborne to the Calgary Flames, a team even more desperate for centres, for a conditional fourth-round draft pick. The pick could turn into a third-round pick "if certain conditions are met in the upcoming season".

The 2013-14 NHL season gets underway on Oct. 1 with the Leafs and Canadiens renewing rivalries, and what better way to get set than a season preview giving you the five reasons to be optimistic, pessimistic, and realistic about the Leafs' chances?

Backes to the Future

Fantasy hockey sleepers studied? Check. Funny fantasy hockey team name? Check. All that stands between you and league domination is a killer fantasy hockey team logo. And you're in luck, because I have a fresh batch, most of which aren't as poorly Photoshopped as last year's logos.

Training camps are open and that means hockey is back. Huzzah, we are safe to watch Sportscentre highlights again!

It also means there is plenty to write about, unless you're super lazy, in which case you can dust off your notebook and pick from one of the tried and true cliché storylines that comes up every training camp. Just add in different names from this year's roster like a Mad Libs story and you're set.

Stick tap to this Bill Simmons article for the inspiration.

On your road to fantasy hockey dominance, the first step is picking an awesome team name. Even if you're a powerhouse team, none of your friends will respect you if you named your team something lame.

The second step is a little more difficult: Identifying who is going to have a great season. Advanced stats can help you find players likely to rebound or breakout, but that level of research can be quite time consuming. To help make your life easier, I came up with a list of players who you should think about come draft day. Some don't fit the traditional definition of a sleeper, but are still going low enough in Yahoo! leagues that you can get major value by drafting them.

Unless you're playing with a bunch of neglectful owners (the absentee parents of fantasy hockey) you will probably need to find an extra edge to outsmart your opponents and win your fantasy hockey league.

Usually, that means finding the best sleepers. But with a bunch of knowledgeable opponents who have all done research and checked the Internet's sleeper lists, you're all likely going after the same players. And when you're all going after the same players it means you're going to have to overpay to get some sleepers, which somewhat defeats the purpose of a sleeper. And if you overpay for a sleeper you better be sure your investment pays off.

For the owner looking for that extra edge, that extra bit of knowledge about a player, which can help you decide whether the sleeper is worth it or whether last year's breakout star can repeat, advanced stats can help.

It's hard to ease back into regular production after posting a dramatic, emotionally-charged coming out story. So to make the transition easier I'll post something that goes in the exact opposite direction—the world famous Fantasy Hockey Team Names list!

Unlike in previous years, I actually didn't have to scour the internet for many fantasy names this time around. That's because my friend Mike (who usually provides a healthy number of the names) went wild this year, sending me probably 95% of the names listed below. He has a gift.

If you somehow can't find a name that tickles your funny bone from the many below, be sure to check out the fantasy hockey team names from 2012, 2011, and 2010. And if you're looking for a logo that strikes fear (and laughter) into your opponents, make sure to check out my bad Photoshop skills.

From the bottom of my heart, thank you all so, so much.

I honestly can't describe how wonderful and loved I have felt over the past few days after posting my story about growing up a gay sports fanatic. The positive response has been so unbelievably overwhelming and all the kind words have been so touching. I'm amazed.

It wasn't easy to write. I had the Word document open for what seemed like forever, waiting almost a year to finally muster up the courage to finish it and post it. Considering the response I'm not sure what took me so long.

Brian Burke saved my life.

At a very dark time in my life he stepped forward and opened a door for me that I thought would forever remain closed. With a simple act of loving and accepting his son, Brian Burke gave me the courage to live.

On the verge of being swept by a glorified AAA team, and in the midst of a seven-game losing streak, the only question remaining about the 2013 Toronto Blue Jays is how low can they go.

At many points over the course of the season you could argue the Blue Jays had hit rock bottom. There were stunning late-inning collapses, massive blowouts, and plenty of games decided by hilariously bad defensive blunders. But it continued to get worse. And now after losing by a combined 20-9 over the first two games of a three-game set against the 43-85 Houston Astros, the last shred of dignity clinging to this pitiful team can be erased with a sweep.

But Toronto sports fans should know that won't be rock bottom either. Toronto sports knows no bottom. At no point should you ever think it can't get any worse. Decades of futility have shown it can, and will, get worse.

The Trade that shocked the hockey world happened 25 years ago, ripping Wayne Gretzky from Edmonton and forever making Peter Pocklington a pariah in the City of Champions. But there exists an alternate universe where Wayne Gretzky was never traded from Edmonton—because he was a Winnipeg Jet.

In Peter Gzowski's best-selling classic The Game of Our Lives, which follows the 1980-81 Edmonton Oilers, a team on the brink of becoming a dynasty, Gzowski tells a story of how Wayne Gretzky was almost traded to the Winnipeg Jets instead of the Edmonton Oilers. The deal never happened because Jets owner Michael Gobuty wasn't a bolder backgammon player.

The statistical revolution is coming to hockey whether you like it or not, and the Bible has been published.

Rob Vollman, tired of waiting for someone else to write hockey's version of The Bill James Baseball Abstract, the seminal work that ushered in baseball's sabermetrics revolution, has published Rob Vollman's Hockey Abstract.

The little deals add up, and for Dave Nonis and the Toronto Maple Leafs, that might mean Cody Franson is firing slap shots from the point for another team next year.

According to TSN's Darren Dreger, the Leafs might not have the cap space to give Franson the deal he wants.

On Monday, Steve Yzerman and his staff released a list of 47 players invited to Olympic orientation camp being held Aug. 25-28.

The decision on who makes the team, as always, will be difficult, as Canada is loaded at all positions. But as the Olympics are in Sochi, Russia this year, the international ice will be a huge factor, so skating ability will be a major selection criterion.

"Ultimately, we'll pick the best players available to us," Yzerman said on a conference call. "But playing on a bigger ice surface, I believe there is a priority on being able to skate."

Olympic camp will give the Team Canada brass a closer look at the Olympic hopefuls. There is a chance for a player snubbed from orientation camp to nab a roster spot, like Patrice Bergeron in 2010 and Bryan McCabe in 2006, but it isn't likely.

Here's a look at the camp invitees and how good of a chance they have at making the 25-man Russia-invading squad.

Video game technology has come a long way since EA Sports released NHL 94 in March, 1993. But the nostalgic death grip that NHL 94 holds over a generation of fans won't subside.

That's why EA Sports intends to recreate the classic game in its latest version of the NHL series, and not by simply slapping on an emulator like in NHL 06. In addition to NHL 14, the game's creators have made a completely updated version of NHL 94 that might just get more game play than the main product.

Greg Wyshynski took it for a test drive and came back with glowing reviews.

The best compliment I can pay EA Sports’ new ‘NHL 94’ anniversary edition: I wanted to bring it home, call my friends, get some six packs and play until dawn.

And by the looks of the trailer, he's not lying.



It's amazing the cultural relevance NHL 94 still has 20 years later. Fans unconditionally love everything about the game, to the point that NHL.com ran highlights with an NHL 94 twist this season and I was sad it wasn't a permanent switch. There is even an online community for the game, with links to emulators and online leagues.

And it's not difficult to see why the love persists. It was a great game to have friends over for a tournament and its easy-to-pick-up, hard-to-put-down quality might have even helped you first fall in love with hockey.

Puck Daddy, with the help of Scotty Wazz, counted down the 10 greatest things about NHL 94 earlier this year, and I wanted to add my own fond recollections to get pumped for the game's modern update.

It took me less than six months to turn on Dave Nonis.

I initially called Nonis a "good hire" in January—despite believing Brian Burke deserved at least one more year at the helm—based on his conservative approach in Vancouver. Nonis didn't sign any albatross contracts in Vancouver, letting a declining (yet still popular) player like Ed Jovonovski walk and balking at Anson Carter's inflated demands even after he finished a (Sedin-created) 30-goal season. He stole Roberto Luongo from Florida and refused to gut the farm system (Alex Edler and Ryan Kesler) for Brad Richards, ultimately costing him his job.

But that conservative approach has been replaced by pure insanity in Toronto.

Living through the JFJ era was torture for Leafs fans, and it appears the misguided, mismanaged ways of the past are returning.

Dave Nonis has used the Leafs' final compliance buyout on Mikhail Grabovski, ridding Toronto of Grabovski's $5.5 million cap hit. The buyout will cost the Leafs $14.33 million in real dollars over eight years, but nothing against the cap.

According to Darren Dreger, the Penguins have offered Letang a hair over $7 million a year for 8 years. But it might not be good enough to keep the defenceman in Pittsburgh, and initial rumour mongering has linked Letang to the Leafs.

Although Letang is a very good player, he has no history in a shutdown role, and the Leafs desperately need a strong defensive upgrade beside Dion Phaneuf to get the most out of their captain. That isn't to say Letang can't perform in that role, but when you have to gut your farm system and shell out huge money to get a player, you want to be reasonably sure he's capable of what you need, and not a $60+ million gamble.

A No. 2 defenceman is the biggest priority for the Leafs, even more so than the never-ending search for a No. 1 centre, mainly because Phaneuf didn't have a particularly good year in 2013 and the deficiencies of the top pair were on full display.

In part, Phaneuf's failings were because Randy Carlyle gave him a purely defensive role the likes of which has rarely, if ever, been seen before. To make things worse, half the season he was playing with AHL players. However, Phaneuf is a quality defenceman, he just needs to be surrounded by other quality defencemen so the hardest defensive duties don't fall on his shoulders alone. Try playing huge minutes against John Tavares and the elites of the league with Korbinian Holzer strapped to your back.

Finding a No. 2 defenceman isn't going to be easy for Dave Nonis. Teams are always searching for top-4 defencemen and guys capable of playing 22+ minutes in a shutdown role aren't just sitting around on the waiver wire. Looking around at the No. 2 defencemen in the league, and finding out how their teams acquired them, could provide insight into how Nonis might go about finding a partner for Phaneuf.

Heading into the final year of his contract, Kris Letang might be pricing himself out of Pittsburgh.

The Penguins are working on extending Letang, but are hesitant to offer much more than $6 million a season. Pierre LeBrun doesn't think Letang will sign for any less than $7 million a season.

The Penguins have the cap space to offer Letang a contract worth $7 million a season, but thanks to massive contract extensions for Sidney Crosby and Evgeni Malkin, more than $34 million is already committed to six players in 2014-15, and adding Letang's big ticket would put them in a cap squeeze.

The Penguins are also concerned about whether Letang is worth elite defenceman money. According to Rob Rossi, "Letang is not the consensus best defenseman on the Penguins, at least in the eyes of management and coaches."

And with the bevy of young defence prospects in the Penguins' system, Rossi believes Letang has become a "must-move player" for GM Ray Shero. The Penguins could decide to keep Letang next season and go for a cup, return be damned, but a trade seems likelier, with CBC's Elliotte Friedman reporting teams are preparing offers in case the two sides fail to reach an agreement.

If the Penguins do decide to trade Letang, there will be plenty of suitors, despite the high cost to acquire the Norris Trophy finalist. More concerning, however, is Letang's desire to be paid like an elite defencemen. Sure, he's scored 190 points over the last five years, tied for 11th among defencemen, but are there enough holes in his defensive game to cause teams to look elsewhere for defensive help?

Is Letang worth $7 million or more over 5-8 years, or is this a case of buyer beware?

After setting the club record for highest save percentage last season, you would think James Reimer could feel safely entrenched as the Leafs' No. 1 goalie. But with the Leafs trading Matt Frattin, Ben Scrivens, and a second-round pick for the Kings' Jonathan Bernier, it seems like Reimer will have another summer looking over his shoulder. 

Acquiring Bernier, despite how little sense it makes, must have been an alluring option for Dave Nonis because the 25-year-old LA King has first-round pedigree. As an 11th overall pick, Bernier exudes the type of upside that GMs drool over.

But just because Bernier was once a high draft pick doesn't mean he holds any more promise than a fourth-round pick, like James Reimer, or even an undrafted goalie, like the departed Scrivens.

With the upcoming end to the Stanley Cup playoffs, rumour time is ramping up, and the latest report indicates the Leafs are one of three teams in the running for the LA Kings' Jonathan Bernier.

GM Dean Lombardi told Bernier he owed the young netminder a chance to be a starter somewhere else, and has begun exploring trade options for the 2006 11th overall pick.

Much like the rumoured Miikka Kiprusoff trade at the deadline, the deal makes little sense for the Maple Leafs.

The Leafs have reportedly made no progress on signing a new deal with soon-to-be free agent Tyler Bozak, and could conceivably trade his negotiating rights to recoup some value. For the Leafs, centre-starved for years, losing Bozak would not be a bad thing.

For years the Leafs searched for an elite winger to flank Mats Sundin. Infuriatingly, once the Leafs finally acquired that elusive missing piece—Phil Kessel—Sundin was retired. The quest then became searching for an elite centre to pair with Kessel.

Tyler Bozak has filled in on the top line about as well as you would expect a third line centre would, and somehow might parlay that experience into a major pay day this summer. GMs are truly stupid people once the free agent market opens.

Bozak didn't have to be the answer, however. There have been a surprising amount of No. 1 centres available through both trades and free agency since Mats Sundin left Toronto. Here is a rundown of who was available and what it would have cost the Leafs to acquire them. Considering the return demanded, maybe the last few years of Bozak won't seem so bad.

For the first time in years, the Leafs will hit free agency with money to spend. Unfortunately, this year's free agent crop is missing out on big name talent, and the areas the Leafs most need to improve, centre and defence, are practically barren. But there is a player practically made to play in Toronto, a folk hero in waiting, one even with Darcy Tucker crazy eyes.

Toronto-born David Clarkson, who grew up idolizing Wendel Clark, will definitely be on Dave Nonis' shopping list if he hits free agency, and for good reason.

Like a soldier returning home from war, the fight may be over for retired NHL enforcers, but adjusting to a normal life isn't easy.

The Last Gladiators, a documentary by Oscar-winner Alex Gibney, focuses on Chris "Knuckles" Nilan, one of the most popular, and most feared enforcers of the 1980s.

Over his 13-year career spent in Montreal, New York, and Boston, Nilan accumulated 3,043 penalty minutes, 110 goals, one Stanley Cup, and a lifetime's worth of scars, thanks in large part to 251 on-ice fights.

"In some respects, I wish he never played hockey," his father Henry is filmed saying through tears.

After the failure of MVP, Power Play, and Rent-A-Goalie, it might seem like TV shows about hockey are destined for failure. But with The Officials, Greg Rosen is out to prove Hockey Night in Canada doesn't have to be the only successful hockey series.

"Four years since writing the 22-minute pilot episode in my crappy student apartment I think I finally put something together that hockey fans will nod in agreement and feel like is a series for them—for us."

The Leafs made the playoffs for the first time in nine years and I almost missed it.

With how the series came crashing down catastrophically at the end, maybe that would have been for the best. But even after enduring insanely improbable heartbreak, the Leafs at least had a chance. And after nearly a decade lost in the bleak wilderness of apathy, I wouldn't trade this season, ending and all, for another lottery finish.

I almost missed the most relevant Leafs hockey in nine years because I was invited to a destination wedding in Punta Cana that inconveniently coincided with games 3-6.

Tip for anyone thinking about getting married: Book it before or after the playoffs, even if you're an Oilers fan and the chances of your wedding interfering with the playoffs is nil (Hey! I can make fun of other teams that don't make the playoffs now and it feels great). Otherwise, make accommodations for your insane hockey friends. For example, I went to a Stag and Doe on the night of Game 2 and one of the groomsmen brought his satellite dish from home and hooked it up so no one had to miss the game (or, more likely, the Stag and Doe). If you're having your wedding this might interfere with things like speeches, but just crank up the volume during intermission and it'll be like Don Cherry is giving you a personal wedding toast. "Keep your stick on the ice, even in the bedroom."

Bringing a satellite dish to Punta Cana probably wasn't going to happen, not that I was worried when I was first invited. I've had my plane tickets booked since last Autumn, well before the NHL lockout even ended, so I initially didn't think my trip south would be anything other than blissful. I wasn't overly optimistic about Toronto's chances heading into the season either, so even when the lockout ended I didn't think a trip in early May would be an issue. There are 10-year-old children who didn't even know the Leafs were allowed to play hockey in May. But as the season crept along, and the Leafs continued to pile on wins, I began to slowly realize that this trip was going to prove challenging.

For normal people, taking a trip to an all-inclusive resort with beautiful sunny weather would wash away any thoughts about a hockey game. Unfortunately, as a Leafs fan, I'm far from normal, and I was in a slight panic. Where was I going to watch the game? Was there an ESPN5 that would at least show some highlights, albeit after three hours of football and basketball coverage? How could I argue with bartenders about the merits of Jake Gardiner over Mike Kostka if I couldn't speak a lick of Spanish (other than "dos cervezas por favor").

After a win in Game 2, it became even more imperative that I watch this series. It was actually going to be a series, not a one-sided beating like many predicted. Luckily, there was a good contingent of Leafs fans going to the wedding, so I wouldn't be alone on my quest to find hockey.

And a quest it was. Here is how my (possibly hazy) memory recalls the week.

"how happy is the sportless vestal's lot
the world forgetting, by the world forgot
eternal sunshine of the sportless mind
each prayer accepted, and each wish resigned"

- adapted from "Eloisa to Abelard," by Alexander Pope

People hate Pierre McGuire. His most redeeming quality is looking like The Master of Disguise dressed as a turtle. Yes, that is a terrible movie and an old enough reference that probably three people thought it was funny. Yes, that is his most redeeming quality.

When I attempted to answer the time-tested question, "Why do people hate Pierre McGuire?" the response was overwhelming. People just don't like him, and they Google their hatred for him a lot.

Mercifully, Pierre McGuire was hired by NBC in 2011, so his presence (at least in Canada, sorry America, you're stuck with him) is minimal. However, his void as the most annoying on-air Canadian personality was filled almost immediately—like a decapitated hydra—by Glenn Healy.

People end up here quite frequently by Googling their hatred for Healy, as well.  So, why do people hate Glen Healy? Let me count the ways.

Looking at the Leafs' stats after the season is a little strange as the lockout caused far lower totals than I'm accustomed to seeing. I'm used to thinking that 30 goals is a pretty solid season for a sniper and it's hard to quickly determine what that 30-goal mark would be during a 48-game season. So to get a better understanding of what type of season the individual Leafs players just had I prorated their 48-game totals to their corresponding 82-game numbers.

The one major caveat of this table is that the missing 34 games of the season would not necessarily play out exactly the same as the other 48, so simply prorating players' 48-game stats over 82 games isn't exactly a precise measure of what an 82-game season would look like. For example, Joffrey Lupul, a career 11.55% shooter, was probably not going to continue shooting 26% over a full year.

Regardless, this table is a quick and dirty look at what the Leafs might have produced in the alternate universe where Gary Bettman didn't flush away the first 34 games of the season.

	Lockout-Shortened 2013 Season				Stats Over Full Season
	GP	G	A	Pts	GP	G	A	Pts
Phil Kessel	48	20	32	52	82	34	55	89
Nazem Kadri	48	18	26	44	82	31	44	75
James van Riemsdyk	48	18	14	32	82	31	24	55
Cody Franson	45	4	25	29	77	7	43	50
Dion Phaneuf	48	9	19	28	82	15	32	48
Tyler Bozak	46	12	16	28	79	21	27	48
Nikolai Kulemin	48	7	16	23	82	12	27	39
Clarke MacArthur	40	8	12	20	68	14	21	34
Joffrey Lupul	16	11	7	18	27	19	12	31
Jay McClement	48	8	9	17	82	14	15	29
Mikhail Grabovski	48	9	7	16	82	15	12	27
Carl Gunnarrson	37	1	14	15	63	2	24	26
Matt Frattin	25	7	6	13	43	12	10	22
John-Michael Liles	32	2	9	11	55	3	15	19
Leo Komorov	42	4	5	9	72	7	9	15
Mark Fraser	45	0	8	8	77	0	14	14
Mike Kostka	35	0	8	8	60	0	14	14
Ryan O'Byrne	42	2	4	6	72	3	7	10
Frazer McClaren	36	3	2	5	62	5	3	9
Colton Orr	44	1	3	4	75	2	5	7
Jake Gardiner	12	0	4	4	21	0	7	7
Korbinian Holzer	22	2	1	3	38	3	2	5
Ryan Hamilton	10	0	2	2	17	0	3	3
Joe Colborne	5	0	0	0	9	0	0	0
Mike Komisarek	4	0	0	0	7	0	0	0